Nightmare in the Timberland

I have this nightmare that involves the same person over and over.

Let me give you some history.

When I was in 6th grade I had a crush, not love, not like, it was a crush. He was the same age. We spent a lot togethers because my older brother and his older brother were on the wrestling team together. Not only that, the same blrother dated my sister. Any Jim, and I were sweet on each other. We went to different schools but saw each other every Friday night at the wrestling matches. He gave me my first ever kiss.

When we got into high school, we were in the same grade so had some of the same classes. We flirted like crazy but I would never go out with him. We just had too much fun flirting. It turned out that when we graduated we walked in and out together. It was kind of nice.

We lost track of each other. After my marriage failed, I decided to look him up. I did end up finding him not very far from where I currently lived. We started dating. He had changed a lot. He was into marshal arts. Had his own studio and was teaching kids. He claimed at one time he had gotten on to the dark side of things and did some things he was not proud of.

We ended up getting engaged. That is were things fell apart. He started drinking a passing out. I was drinking as much as he was. His roommate started hitting on me. The next thing I know, I was doing his roommate. I backed out of the relationship.

I have not talked to Jim since then. He has married someone else and has kids.

Now about my dream. I keep dreaming some how he comes back into my life. It is not a good thing. He is every controlling. No matter how hard I try to escape, he is there. He is watching me. I can't run. I can't hide. He is just always there.

I am in a big house trying to find a way out. There is no way to escape.

I am wondering if this is my guilt coming out. But as far as I know he is happy, why should I feel guilty? He is married with children. I am guessing he is very happy.

This is not the first time he has entered my dreams. He keeps coming back like a Jason movie. Each time, I am scared and running. And he? He looks happy that I am scared. He is smiling the entire time. He takes his time following me, I am running like a scared deer.

How do I deal with this? Do I go to see a shrink? I won't tell my husband, He trys to analyze everything any way and none of it makes any sense.

How do I get Jim to go a way?